I tried a body therapy for ptsd and stress. It works. But now I am in deep shock, very angry about what's happened to my life. Intellectually, I understand it. There was a very simple method that might have changed the course of my life thirty years ago.

I should be happy that I can heal myself and live a good life. Instead I am furious. I've been hurt a long time. People have given up on me. My therapist has been telling me about clients who go to the state hospital to get hooked up with social security disability and section eight housing and all that mess. I didn't survive this long for that.

I am fighting everyone. No one believes in me. No one is helping me. I feel I am all alone. I don't know if I'm waking up to new levels of understanding about my situation or having a sort of flashback to the whole miserable past.

I've had chronic ptsd a long time. I've lived in dissociation or parasympathetic something a long time. I feel alive again and it makes me mad. I should be ecstatic, but I'm angry and hurt.
Q
It's a new kind of shock.

Help!