Thank you so much for the virtual hugs, replies and concern. That is why I like PC so much. People here take me seriously.

My suicidal thoughts have subsided for the time being. Thanks to you guys. I hope it will not come back anytime soon. Overwhelming things happened, and it made me break down.

archipelago: No i've never even considered it, because i have never heard of one. I'm not even sure if there are any in my country. Perhaps I could try it when i have another meltdown. Thanks for the suggestion, it would help to talk to someone about it and who isn't judgmental and accusatory, and I'll try to look for other alternatives if there aren't any.