The samaritans is meant to be a good hotline.

08457 90 90 90
If Christmas starts to hurt, we?ll be here | Samaritans

I used to have the number saved in my phone but I never actually called it in the end, maybe I should have given it a chance at my darkest times.

Also there is a charity based in London, I don't know where abouts you are but they specialise in suicidal people and offer a 5 night stay. You get a few phonecalls and stuff while you are being assessed and they are really nice and supportive.

Its called Maytree.

020 7263 7070
You matter - Suicidal Sanctuary - MayTree

I'm glad the thoughts have subsided, but if they come back I hope these can help you