I finally feel 1% better... It is not much but I have contacted my 2 best friends of course 1 of them is angry with me but he'll come to help me no matter what. My 2nd best friend was messaging me for long and he was very soothing and supportive to me

He is currently away abroad and he feels sad that he is not with me but I told him that I will call him in the morning when I get to office so I feel like the weight I am carrying is lifting slowly. He asked if my BF has bipolar??!! but I have no clue about that.

I am taking the steps to move away. Yes I see the signs of abuse in this relationship. Huge red flags. I am terribly scared as to what he'll do. I just need to surround myself with people to help me out of this.

It is my fault for falling into this.