I was married for 15 years before this to a man who was abusive, controlling violent. I left him and at the same time my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer and my mother with breast cancer. I fled the marital home and my ex would not let me take the children. He used them as a weapon against me as it was all he had left.

Initially it was very difficult.....I virtually broke down emotionally, physically and mentally. Gradually I built myself up, made a home for myself and my children, went through the courts for a few years for my children. I had nothing from the marital home, I had to take it step by step and provide everything myself.

I did it though an became so much stronger for it and made a new life for myself and my children.

I was happy being single, I made new friends and had family for support. Gradually I began to enjoy my single independent life and as I was happy in myself I believe I met someone as I was ready.

It was a gradual process and initially I was very protective of my children and didn't introduce my now partner to my children. Eventually when I was happy and we had decided that we wanted a future together I introduced my children to him. They adored him as he did them.

So just let yourself begin to heal.....take it slowly and day by day......eventually you will make a new life for yourself, and you will be happy again and will meet someone who is right for you.......lol I can remember my family and friends saying the same to me and thinking there is no way on earth I ever want to meet another man!

It happens though and will when you are ready. Its difficult to look to the future when you are hurting so much and your emotions are raw. Just let yourself feel these emotions and slowly you will heal and you will eventually see a future and begin to enjoy it.

I did have counselling and feel this was a great help......A place to go to let go of my emotions in a safe environment and not be judged, just supported.

Please look after yourself now....find some support.....sending a big hug x