DBT can work well when I'm around people who can help me maintain a stoic indifference. I wish I could change my therapist, but I can't without causing myself more distress (very late night appointments after work).

My therapist doesn't use dbt, but I learned it and it works overall, but I need to be around people who aren't always happy, but are coping. At work, people put on happy faces, so I feel like I'm failing because I can't be like that. I'm coping, not happy and dbt isn't really there to make you happy, just helps you gain control of yourself in hopes that it will lead you toward happiness later.

My therapist does psycho-dynamic therapy, which I've found is horrible for me. Delving into my past has often brought up pain that I can't resolve and made me fall into deeper depression. Now he just sits and listens to me whine about the whole therapeutic process, which isn't all that helpful either.

I think I'm one of those patients people don't want to have. I'm not a very good patient because I can't stop trying to think about my therapist and psychiatrist and primary care doctor are all trying to just get me to be someone else's problem. I'm now trying to look at hormone issues and was supposed to follow up on neuro-psych testing. For now the hormone thing is all I can handle.

Biggest pain point for me right now is the shame that I feel for having emotional pain. It has limited my ability to function and made me less capable than I could have been. I have failed to achieve academic success (was hoping to get a PhD when I was younger) and now I'm limited at work because it holds me back. I am ashamed of my constant wanting to avoid people around me and reality. It's just hard to accept life for what it is and not judge.