Hello Bluelighter -- I am up bec. I can't sleep.

I empathize with not being able to tell your mother. My family thinks I am a "drama queen" because of my depressive periods.

Sometimes I notice now that it's not "nothing" that triggers a downward bounce, but some little thing. A remark someone makes that the economy is bad, and I am out of work. Some little comparison that I mentally make between myself and someone smarter or prettier, etc.

Knowing what triggered me doesn't really help get out of it, though.

Hand in there. This is a wonderful forum, with so many people caring about each other, and offering understanding and love.