I want to start by saying i really do love my t. She is great. I am lucky, she's youthful, vibrant, kind and bubbly. I really had a hard time even going in the first place because in my mind, i thought i was weak for being unable to overcome my problems. I always thought with education and rationale I could learn to conquer anything and that I'd never really need anyone for help with that.
I started for a seemingly innocent objective and a year and a half later (with a 6 month break) I'm in the throes of darkness from my past. I'm doing this transference thing and I'm fighting this so much!
The worst part is, one day (after finally getting on Lexapro) my t says to me: "I don't really know anything about you before age 19". That's where it all began....
So, I decide I trust her and I dive head first into mounds and layers of hideousness that I've shut down and locked away. We start with it all and of course my symptoms amplify and I accept that ,as i have a safe person to go down that road with. Now, after maybe 2 months and just getting into what's happened to me, she wants me NOT to focus on the past and start doing things to better my "self talk" and combat my thinking. What the F*&$******????
We just chipped the edge and I raring to go and I feel so angry!!!!! She minimizes everything!!!!
I know what you're all thinking, tell her, tell her. Well, I did and she said she never meant to minimize my pain and suffering as a young adult/young child. But she still wants to just focus on excercising anf positive thinking. She doesn't want to "ruminate" with me about the past. Jeez, thanks for the support doc.

I was almost there, ready to reveal and let the darkness reach the light. But now, I'm gonna put it right back.
I'm.just.done.over.it.and.I'm.turning.it.off.