I've been away from my PHP for over a week due to health reasons and right now, the impulse is pretty strong. I was forced to sign one of those stupid 'no harm' contracts about two weeks ago.

I know I'm probably going to cut, but I know if I go back, and they find out what I did, I'm in deep *****.

The first professional that ever said something to me was a psych nurse when I was hospitalized. This was in February of this year. I ended up in the psych-med unit and they put medication on the cut's twice a day. The first time she did it she said 'I know Reesecups didn't deserve this'. It really touched me.

My outside T understands it. Would never hospitalize me for it so I can tell her. But about 2 weeks ago, my Case Manager threatened to make me lift up my shirt. I've taken some medication to calm me down, I'm waiting for it to kick in.