Gloria there is no need for apology, because while apparently you see yourself doing the same thing your friend did, in fact you are doing the opposite and living by your own advice.

It is not expected that the decision to "love it or leave it" be made lightly, quickly, or without a lot of fear and stress and questioning. Just because you have been very unsure, and this has been a process rather than a "decision," the fact is that all this time you have been working on clarifying your thoughts and feelings so that you could eventually make a decision.

You're accusation of her was about continually complaining about it without making any effort or consideration as to what to do to better the situation. That is the easy course to take... to whine but just accept the status quo. The fact that you have had such difficulty wrestling with this over a period of time shows that have been questioning which road to take. Choosing and following through is a process, not a decision. You have been in the process of making that choice.

(I am also assuming that by "grand choice" you mean leaving your husband, and acknoleging that it won't be an easy thing to do but will be in your and your children's best interest, if that is the choice you have made).

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