Thanks for the responses. I've already seen significant improvements with just small changes in my daily habits. I no longer let people pressure me into eating to the point of discomfort and don't consume food or nearly as much processed food, and I set aside about 2 hours a week for exercise. No more going to sleep at 3am either.

I'm planning on going grain-free soon, and will get full-body sun exposure when the weather permits it. I only wish my backyard still had privacy from the neighbors

It's really a shame how poor health can creep up slowly on a person and that it usually isn't obvious to them how miserable they are. Hearing that you should eat healthy and exercise unfortunately makes no difference to most people either.

___

Doctor to my 12 year old self:

No, you just have a psychological problem, these pills are affective in treating what ails you, (though they might affect your cognitive development in ways we don't yet have data for and might make you even more suicidal), oh by the way, diet and exercise might help, too.

(cuts self for months before anyone notices, gets scalded by mother as attention seeking and threatens to have me dragged away and stripped naked and watched every second of the day. Also accused of doing drugs ).

Doctor to 18 year old self:

This will just level you out, these mood swings aren't normal at all.

(gives me risperidone when I obviously presented with insomnia and acute stress to the point of almost total dissociation, doesn't tell me what it is, what it's used to treat, and didn't inform me on ANY of the risks or side effects).

Weeks later I have budding breasts (as if male puberty wasn't enough, I now had to go through female puberty). Level me out?! I went batshit insane on that poison and nearly killed myself.

Ahhh, psychiatry, how I absolutely despise you.