Also, when you were a baby/young child, if you didn't have "self-love" did that mean you didn't deserve your parents' love either? That explains a lot.

I don't mean I need someone to love me to love myself. I'm not quite that stupid. I just don't see the logic in loving someone (as in myself) who is unlovable. Even if someone "loved" me, it wouldn't make me lovable. That's the difference.