I appreciate the position of not taking my side as "gospel". I have been struggling with that as well.

This started alomst right after we got married and has been progressive over that time. I went through several months of trying to figure out what I was doing to bring all of this on, but the more I tried to be what I thinks she wants me to be, the more the conflict.

Even now, after having friends and family say that they see the behavior in her as well, I am still having a hard time believing that this is happening and continue to wonder what I'm doing wrong.

To answer your questions;

1) I do feel like I still love her, but I also feel like there is far more hurt than love in our marriage and I don't know if I can continue to live like this. I also am adimant that we not bring a child into this marriage unless/until we improve our communication and resolve some of these issues. She wants us to be trying to get pregnant and when I expressed to her that I didn't think now was the time to be trying to have a baby, and that I thought we should be extremely careful to that end, she told me that was a reflection of my commitment to her and that I was being selfish.

2) It's actually not easy to say right now why I fell in love with her. I thought we had a lot in common, I thought we got along pretty well, I enjoyed being around her and I felt like she needed me.