I'm sorry you are feeling so badly. There is more evil and cold heartedness than I ever thought, too. I grew up in a very sheltered town and family. I was in for a rude awakening when I grew up. Now I'm 61 and am still surprised by people hurting each other so much.

I hope you can get past being betrayed and used. It only saps your strength. I hope the racing thoughts stop. I know how bad those can get. You do have a son that needs you and that should be enough to keep you going. I know even now my daughter is the only thing that keeps me going.

I hope you feel better soon.