My abusers were not family members, but my mother died when I was a young child and my father might as well not have been there because he was so distant. He didn't even let me call him "dad" -- we were literally on a first name basis. He really got distant when he went to prison. Anyway, for me, I picked new family. Friends who I could come to trust and be with at holidays, call with my problems, and whatever else I needed family for. My father's out of prison now, but I still go to my friends/new family for Thanksgiving and I'm totally comfortable with that. My child within likes that.

Be well,

mtd