Honestly, I don't know what to tell you. I totally get it, I have DPD as well, and my mother is my vice as well but it seems so hard to just sever the ties. I would suggest attempt making small steps - changing the little things that you know you could do alone and perhaps that will give you the motivation to attempt independance in bigger areas. Also, if you do get a job, besides the financial benefit - the responsibility and independence you'll feel in having it could give you the confidence to make even more changes. Starting is the hardest part.