So I have a sleep deprived EEG tomorrow with a terrible woman who runs the EEG machine and triggered me bad when I wasn't sleep deprived. It's 4 AM here and I'm SOOOO bored and I really just want to say damn it to hell and not go tomorrow and just go to bed right now.

I can already feel this really effecting my mood, especially since sleep is a way of coping with stress and things I don't want to think about. Like the fact that I'm being completely shut out (for good reason but I don't like it) by friends, and it's bringing back a lot of bad **** from my past and feeling like an object not a person and wanting to SI but I'm at my fiancés house so I can't.

Also my fiancé's asleep because he has to take me there and back and can't be sleep deprived like me!