wisewoman im sorry im only getting to read this now.
there is never black and white in life no matter what confused thoughts we sometimes have. im so very glad you got to see his good deeds. every life has a value. every single one because lives always have a value we never get to see beyond that we do get to see. even if he had never been kind to your family i believe his life would have had value anyway in the lessons it and his death have taught you.
i am very impressed by your ability to let this event lead your thoughts to explore yourself and life further. there are so many things in life we will never understand but sometimes we get a glimpse into the greater mysteries throught people like your brother and the effect his passing has.
im sorry for any fear or confusion it has placed on you but also glad his personal hell has ended.
my thoughts are with you and your family right now. please remember to take care of yourself through this.
biiv