Man I wish I had some vodka now. Just came back from my T. He's pretty cool and all no issues with him. I was expecting to talk about my ADHD and instead all he wanted to talk about was my past. I asked what about my adhd? Oh I finished my report, I think you have adhd now it's up to the pdoc to decide what meds. I said but isn't there a test? He said there are tests but he can tell just by talking to him because I zone out a lot. And then back to the past we went. I hate talking about my past. He asked me some more recent stuff too like how I been doing. I said great! Wasn't lying. He asked when was the last time I heard voices, I said I dunno, may be a month. I lied a little there, prolly closer to 2 weeks. Visuals? I can't remember when. He did NOT bring up my "friend" and I was glad. I asked him where he's going here. He said no worries he was just trying to determine if I may possibly be schizoaffective with bipolar. I said I don't want another label. He said no no no, there will be no additional label, it takes a long time to determine schizoaffective any way and besides he assured me I was highly functional so it won't matter and besides the treatment and meds are the same any way. SO like 3/4 of our hour was spent on him questioning me about what kind of delusions I had, last time, about and trama as a child, thank god the time went by fast but he wants to continue in 3 weeks where we left off!

I asked again what about the adhd, he said don't worry about it, the pdoc will come up with a treatment and med right for you. Let's concentrate on some other areas in the mean time.

So I don't know what to make of all that. If I tell him too much I might regret it. I'm starting to think I need to back off being totally honest. I don't care if I'm schizoaffective and or bipolar. I just wanted to get treated for adhd. Already I'm on a new freaking med seroquel. I dunno. I feel uneasy about all this.