>>>i've told him i'm afraid that j. will scream. i've said that already. i'm not sure how seriously he takes that... i'm not sure how much people typically do act up when they switch either. i've heard that some protectors talk big but act little. i don't know. i'm just afraid that they will really try to shove him away hard and screaming could be a relatively harmless way of doing that... so i don't know.

Are you afraid to say this to him? He might assuage your fears on this.

Curious, not sure i caught how long you've been going with this t. You may still be broaching the comfort zone ya know? I have been for 1 1/2 year with 6 months off in between and started bi weekly, now weekly, but I've just BARELY revealed some boundary issues. And yeah, I watch it too...i don't want her to think I'm gonna stalk her (esp because I'm gay and she's straight).
I'm not in LOVE with her and don't fantasize about her romantically, yet at least, but I think I'd be afraid to admit that to her if I ever felt it. Although, I'm sure she's heard it all before. Mostly I've revealed how kind she is, how much I like her and how I wish we could be friends instead of client/therapist. I will never forget her response.

She does however, reveal quite a bit about herself with me and although I like that, I get jealous that she has other clients. I think, well maybe, she's touching/suggesting, sensitively, to a possible dual realtionship thing as well, so I'm not sure yet if I completely trust where she's going. In my case, it's different than yours. I understand your reservations.

Curious, yea, good thinking, he may wish to "prompt" you to switch. He could want that for many reasons.....
1. He thinks you're ready to deal with that.
2. He thinks you may have to do that to make progress.
3. He is asserting his power in the overall imbalance of the dyad (hopefully not tho)
4. He is ready to understand you more thoroughly and to do this he would rather you "switch" then hear you talk about it.
5. He's caught onto any possible avoidance you're managing to keep it all in check.

Do you TRUST him fully????? Maybe he's sensing you don't and testing YOUR boundaries this way too.

Ahhh, the attachment, I hate it and I'm addicted to it, and I'll tell you in like maybe 9 more months, if it was truly necessary to have to implement the changes I want. Should we fight it? Accept it only as a part of therapy? Fall head first (and heart first) into it and relish it and worry later about terminations? I can't say-YET- I do manage this perception as best I can. Maybe she's good enough to see through me, but she isn't acting like I'm a loony toon yet.

Alexandra, you are such a little researcher! Love it, me to...