I know the feeling. I've been right where you are. To help me I used to write self affirmations on all of the mirrors in my home. They were put there in dry erase makers for me that was important because if I wanted to erase it I could. I had to have the courage to believe that it being there wasn't a bad thing. That it being there was a way to help me. When I get in depressions now I still do that. It helps to renew that tiny flicker of hope that keeps my head above the crashing waters that try to down me. It might help you to do something similar. But inside I know you have the courage you just have to figure out how to get in touch with it.
As far as the getting out of bed. I had to have someone hold me accountable. They started our with small things like taking a shower or eating a healthy meal. Then it got harder going out to do something with her (not really around people we went hiking) or exercising for a few mins then increasing the time. You have to find something/someone to drive you to get up and get the good thoughts cooking.
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