I think my therapist has at times and there was at least one awful session that completely lacked any empathy and left me feeling completely shattered. I am also very attached to my therapist. There were things going on in her own life, and I believe she took a step back from me as well. Gradually she returned to being much more empathetic, but we still don't have quite the same relationship that we did before. My attachment is no longer stable. In the long run, well, I really don't think life is long enough to stick with someone who continues to harm you in that way. There is no way to help a therapist to be more empathetic, that's completely in their hands.

Even though my therapist has returned to being very empathetic, I'm seeing a second therapist at the moment. It really does help to be able to talk to someone else and see the way you can quite quickly gain support from another person who comes in with a whole new set of qualities. Given how attached you are, I really think it would be useful if you could just talk over this whole situation with someone objective. Sometimes something like seeking out help from somewhere else can feel like the last thing you want to do, but I think that can be part of the avoidance that springs up if really don't want to contemplate the end. Sometimes it's worth pushing through that and just giving it a go anyway. You clearly do want and need the help and support or you wouldn't be trying so hard to find it with your current therapist who keeps missing the mark.

If there is any way you could find someone else to talk this over with, I do think it would help. I know you really don't want to leave your therapist, so even though she's been harming you and not really doing the job she should be, you could think of it as seeing her less regularly, but that it's not going to be a black and white ending, she will still be there, so you haven't lost this person you're so attached to. If you find someone who can really hear you, I think you may surprise yourself and find that you need your current therapist's "support" less and less. I understand what it's like to need to keep going back, even when you feel like you're being badly hurt, but it's a really unhealthy dynamic and if it doesn't improve, I dont think it does any good in the long run.