IK, I just posted hear, sorry. I am going to be seeing my fam. soon I need advice

So I am going to be visiting my family for Christmas.They deal with depression & bipolar.

But I always obsesses about it. I always talk to about suicide, not saying that I will kill myself. But i just talk about in general, & I kinda joke about it. I also talk about depression a lot.Like a lot. No joke.

Als, how can I not talk about it?