So, thru therapy I've come to realize my mother was/is a horrible mother. I'm 45 now, she's 74.

I have a daughter who is 16. As a parent myself, before therapy, I looked back and realized she wasn't the greatest, but thru therapy, I've realized just how awful, narcissistic, selfish, etc etc she is and how that's affected me my entire life.

I've discussed it at great length w my T. I won't confront her because that will not do anything good for me and she will deny, cry, etc. I just don't want to see her. Sounds bad, but just as my T said, she made a choice to do those things she did. I struggle now, (same age as her when she was busy screwing me up) but I choose to get help and not put my kid last. She doesn't get a pass for just getting old.

I never suffered from any form of physical abuse whatsoever from anyone...just the usual neglect, etc. So I went thru my life hating myself, never thinking I was good enough, ...the usual pathology.

Anyway, ONLY reason I'm going is bc my daughter doesn't know how crappy her grandmother was to her dad (she's a good grandma), and I'll make it thru for my kid, but really have no desire to see her. And yes, I'm angry with her...I know it comes thru. She sucks. She made choices to put one of her several husbands first. As a parent I'm pissed she could do that to her own kid and now I think she doesn't deserve a thing...but I won't do that to my daughter and/or use her as a pawn.

Just venting...thanks for reading