manymiles, I think you were right in saying that facing my problems can help me in forgiving myself.

My family has been trying to get me to go to the doctor but I have been procrastinating for the past 7 weeks, which added to my anxiety and shame towards them. Today I managed to step outta my house for the first time in 7 weeks - went to see the doctor at the polyclinic to get a referral letter for a psychiatric consultation at the hospital and to get hydroxyzine for my insomnia.

I felt crappy for the entire time; avoided eye contact with everybody. I don't know why I don't feel particularly elated at the progress, but I am just glad that I have something to answer to my family. At least I am moving forward bit by bit.