Quote:
Originally Posted by pamj533
hey michanne.dont know if i can help.but i want u to know that someone cares.i an a night person.always have been.i know ur talking alot about ur job.but ur first sentences were about that and your cat.and u said that was not the issue.but i think(and i dont know) those two things are ur main issues.ur still grieving over ur cat.that maybe stupid to some.but not to me.actually.i bet there are alot of people on here that love animals like we do.do u have children? i do.and i love my children more of course.but b4 i had kids.animals were my kids.and really still are.if u cant sleep.maybe do art? if u cant do anything now.then grieve,cry.its ok.as a career change? if u can afford it.or work and do it.what about a vet.for animals(we need them at night) nurse..hosp. always open(at night) try and think of any night jobs,or jobs that u would like.but.it is holidays.they not good for me.and maybe not for u.esp.since u lost someome(ur cat).that u loved sooo very much.sorry if i didnt help.not good at this. pamj533
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Thanks Pam,
I think you're right! I started thinking it was one issue and it was really another. I do not have kids and won't so my cats were my family. I could only cry twice. I can be sad but not cry. It is because of the medication I am on. I cut it back a little bit (Zoloft) but I know myself and cutting it back too much would be a bad idea. I wish I hadn't needed it.
I considered night jobs but I know what I want to do. I have an IT background but it is the kind of thing only large companies need. I can't do it pt or freelance. It is not hard for me to learn web optimation and design and that is usually small businesses so I can do freelance. That would allow me to make my own schedule. I also found an online job I can do. Eventually I would like my art to at least pay for itself or teach it. All these things take time to build which is what I hoped to do these last few months while I had some cash. But now I need to make essentially start again... Do the job I don't like but pays really well until I have enough to jump ship. I'm not complaining just a little disappointed in life.
I forgot to mention I also sleep too much in the day. Today I felt mostly awake at 8:30 but decided to sleep a little longer. Well, next think I knew the reminder for a party was going off at 1:00. I had this dream that was this weird hybrid of Battlestar Galactica and Game of Thrones mixed in with a concern about my mother's lack of interior decorating skills. I can pick it apart (one of the weirder dreams) but the point is I remember not wanting to wake up. I'm just not motivated and I want to be I just can't get myself there. Now that my cat is gone there is no one to take care of and if my career is in flux it is hard to feel productive.