>>>>>I don't even feel like I have reason half the time to be the way I am. Some ppl go through so much and I don't know why I'm so pathetic

Hey Eva, don't compare you. Your pain is pain, it is yours and uniquely yours. It hurts all the same and never feel otherwise.

Cutting is a very fast and effective measure to falsely feel better right away. I feel it too.

Can you take a day, an afternoon, an hour--anything--for taking care of you? Sounds like you need to slow and check in, maybe just curl up and away from the overwhelming-ness. Did you cut because you needed to say something? Feel something? Were you just angry?

I am here for you......