Quote:
Originally Posted by lightinthesky
Hello everyone, as you might have heard I am just out of a 4 years relationship. I am still very young but when I met my boyfriend I was very, very young. I was only 17, I realized that I don't even remember myself being a single person, my life always included my other half in it and it was always the same 1 man. I noticed that I act weird around other men, it is like they don't exist for me, it is like something switches in my had and even my eyes look away. I wonder if anyone else went through this or maybe it is because I only had 1 serious relationship in my life? I always felt bad when someone was flirting with me and I never flirted back because my bf wouldn't like it. I am scared that he changed something inside me that might ruin my future chance for happiness, or maybe I just don't know how to be single? what is wrong with me?
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Nothing wrong with you at all. You're normal and are still new to being single as an adult. Being in a long relationship like that you've built up habits that acommodated your bf at the time and it's not like you can just turn on/off a switch that makes you feel single. As much as people hate to hear it, it takes time to accept being single and act accordingly. I am a father of 3, with two at home, and been married 2x, which amounts to about 20 yrs of my life being in relationships. Prior to that I was always living at home or in a relationship for most of my teen to adult life. I have been out of my last marriage about 2 yrs now and it only started to get better after about a year and a half. I'm still not completely used to it but a helluva lot more independent than I used to be! To emphasize this, my apartment in about 5 days is the FIRST ever, I have gotten on my own and will be living in with just me and the boys. So I understand.
It feels good once you start to find your own way, trust me, and take heart, it WILL happen. Take care of you and let it happen on as things change for you.
On top of that, give yourself time and don't worry about men right now. Don't avoid them but don't worry about how you act around them, just be yourself and enjoy life for awhile.
Hope this helps,
S4