Feeling better tonight, maybe it's just the 'going to a wedding' part that really got to me last night. I know these feelings will come and go like emotional vomit, but in the moment when it's here it can feel pretty hard to concentrate on the present and not dwell on loss of past and future, but I'll do my best.

We are both in the process of us not living together, but she has no family here to move out to and even though I'm not renewing the lease I'm still beholden to my current lease. I've no one to move in with myself, we both spend as much time as possible not in the apartment and away from each other, but until she finally gets her stuff out of here I know there will probably be more nights of sadness and negative feelings. Being the dead of winter doesn't help (tons of snow and ice and cold weather up here in Michigan till sometime in April make everything more difficult mentally and logistically) the tentative plan now (after several fights) is her fully moved out by end of January. I'm still in the process of informing the rest of my friends and family this holiday, which the news still may not fully get around to everyone for a couple months after.

I've no idea if she's even informed her family, I know her sister knows we're broken up, but her parents still sent Christmas gifts for me through the mail recently, so for all I know they still think we're a couple. I plan on going through that awkward process tomorrow at my families Christmas get together.

I do see a therapist once a week right now to get through my sadness's and have someone to talk to about moving forward, so far the talks have been helpful and usually immediately upon leaving the office I feel a lot better about myself and my position, but I wouldn't say that feeling last much past a day or two. He's giving me some sound advice, which has kept me more level headed through these current arguments with my ex, but it's still not an easy process.

Thanks for your advice on here as always, I will do what I can to not give in to these sad thoughts and feelings when they arise, while trying hard to make myself live more in the present.