Ruth, this is a hard one. I would venture to say your daughters view this situation based upon what Amber said. You may need to just accept reconciliation on their terms. Perhaps to this day you have no regrets but regardless whether you do don't, your actions hurt your daughters greatly. If I were you, I'd be sure to let them know that you regret hurting them, and you accept whatever reconciliation they are willing to grant you.

As far as judging is concerned, this idea that anyone who is a Christian is not supposed to judge is a bunch of crock. Jesus says, 'judge not for which judgement you judge you shall be judged', and the Apostle Paul told the church in Corinth that the spiritual man judges all things. Do these two statements contradict each other? Not at all. I'm not going to take the time to elaborate except to say that judging between right and wrong is certainly NOT what Jesus was talking about.