Every year these emotions get a bit worse for me. I have a history of CSA. Anyway this is going to sound crazy but here it goes.

The day before New Year's Eve I start getting anxiety and fearful sad. The day of New Year's Eve I actually start feeling NAUSEUS on and off all day headaches, anxiety , sadness , impending doom , angry, pain in my body and in places I would rather not mention.

In the past I have gone to doctors have had blood tests cat scans gyn tests everything was ok. Am I crazy.?

All these symptoms are on and off until after 1am of the new year. I feel like before the strike of midnight I'm terrified something is out to get me, like its not a beginning to me it's more like an ending. I relive these emotions of whatever this is every year.

I'm so scared I have tried everything every year I try to sleep through it and I can't, I try to get drunk , doesn't help, I get bad thoughts but I pretend I'm fine but I'm not.

I have never told anyone of this but this year it's a bit worse. I'm afraid to tell t.

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