Thanks. We have talked extensively about my asking him back on board. She had me do some pretty hard thinking about this.

We've talked a lot about why I want him back on and what would happen if he were to say no. First while I don't agree with the last few months with him, ie: the contract. I have to say that overall he was an excellent doctor for me. In the event he says no while I think it may slow me down a bit but I don't foresee any major issues. I think all the work I do with DBT on a daily basis will be "automatic" enough that I will be able to use the skills to help me through. I am determined to not let a "no" from him send me off the deep end if in fact that's what happens.

I know anything is possible, while my progress has been tremendous the last few months I am still not that far from the acting out Melissa when I wasn't getting my way or didn't like something. So that just means I just need to be extra mindful when I receive his response. My T will also be available if I need her because she will be back from maternity leave before I even send the letter.

In terms of my actual asking him I believe that the pros outweigh the cons. Meaning I think there's more good that would result from asking him than avoiding asking him out of fear. It always be rolling around in my mind so the decision to send the letter could change at anytime if and/or wen a legitimate, heavy enough weighing reason comes up. I have a little over a month before I send it...if in fact I follow through with the plan thus far.

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