Welcome to PC. Therapy is the best place to start honestly. It is proven to be more helpful for this disorder than meds, though meds often help with some symptoms. A lot of these fears you have are very normal. I felt the same way starting therapy 7 months ago. The process is slow, it's a personal growth really. These feelings and thoughts will be answered through the therapy process. Here at PC we struggle in similar ways and understand where you are coming from. This is a great place to express your concerns, sympathy, empathy, pains, joys, hobbies, and to share and gain wisdom with others.