I am seeing a guy who is 40 (I am 26), he has three children 10, 13, and 17. I have one son who is 3. I grew up in a home with constant competition with my step sister because my step mother showed her favortism over me. In saying that please understand I am very careful in my treatment of his vs. mine in our relationship. We all live together in my home. His 3 kids are consistently breaking my 3 year olds toys as they are not made for them, I wait for a response from their father and one never comes...all I ever recieve is an abrasive disposition and a "oh well, I will look at it tomorrow and it never happens. My true issue the one I am seeking advice upon comes to play with the 17 year old. He is rude, disprespectful and down right mean to everyone IF he feels like it. He is only held accountable for his actions by his father if the behavior is exhibited toward him. If he does it to me and I say something to his father I get the whole "your the adult say something to him" or "I dont think he meant it like that". Now when I was 17 years old I had a very tramatic incident occur at a party one night. I would rather not go all into detail as it is humiliating and I would rather forget. However, the 17 year old found out about this from an old friend of mine (we live in a very small town), and he came home and asked about it. I was honest with him and talked to him about it and explained that I do not like to hear about all the time. So please do not share as it hurts my feelings. About 2 months ago in a large group of people he shared the information as a joke. Although, it can be percieved as funny it is hurtful to me. I shared this with him again and asked that he please not do that to me anymore. Yesterday at FAMILY CHRISTMAS in front of a large group of people (not my family, theirs) he does it again....AS A JOKE!!! I tried shutting him down, changing the subject but he kept on with the story!!!!!!!! I said something to his father and got the "your the adult speech" what do I do as this behavior is making me want to shut down emotionally and turn bitter!

Thoughts?