</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
tiodlliwi said:
It seems as thought the only thing that is more difficult than muddling through a relationship is... muddling through a relationship with an anxiety disorder (or fill in the blank with your own illness).

Can anyone tell me: how do we determine if we are just anxious individuals and this seaps into many aspects of our lives, especially relationships? OR if we are anxious because of bad relationships?

I am always worrying about the future- how we will be as parents, will we have enough money, what sorts of careers will we have long-term, what would we do if x,y, or z happened? These sorts of things. When I continuously bring these things up to my husband, he gets frustrated that these things are all we ever talk about...

So I guess I'm asking for advice- do you think that if I had a husband who was more career-driven, a better care-taker, etc. that these worries would even go away?

I'm just looking for someone to respond who maybe can relate or to verify that even with a great relationship, we can still feel this crappy and scared about the future??!!!

Help!!!

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

YES....... We all have these kinds of concerns even in the best of relationships, that is plain human nature..... but it is to much or on the verge of OCD when these thoughts control our life or damage the love we share with another.

I personally do not believe that your insecurities / fears will go away if your husband was to change and do it over night, for the problem does not live in him, but rather it is growing in you.

Maybe you should sit down and write a long list of all the things that have worried you and that you have stressed over without a good reason.... YOU might be surprised to learn that this type of behavior has always been apart of who you are and will continue to be so until YOU CHANGE.

BTW - I have found that after 20 years of marriage that not all the problems I deemed as "my husbands fault" were not always his to hold alone..... some of the problems lived only in ME, my fearful mind.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -