...oh hell I wake up after a giant hit of C2H5OH...

and it's not nasty like it used to be...

something inside me has adapted to seriously large amounts of this stuff

...I am so dis-interested in what makes me function...

which is really a dysfunction

...I can wander around pissed....and equally wander around ....

this equidistant dis-satisfaction is ...

who cares!

I can continue finding reasons to not do this...

I find none

what happens?....

I tell me...myself that I function better this way

so to hell with it