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fayerody said:
you know, Checkers, you got a lot more responses than some threads do and plenty of good suggestions.

i actually agree with "justaguy" because being pregnant and having a baby and breastfeeding is very hard. how much have you done to look at it from that perspective?

and i do applaud the fact that you're working on it, but after reading your answer to "justaguy"......i'm not sure that i feel like i am getting the whole story on the marriage. i may be wrong and we can talk about it......do you have a short fuse? xoxox pat

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Not at all. I simply don't find justaguy's responses to be particularly helpful, whether on my thread or elsewhere. He makes assumptions that are incorrect and proceeds from that faulty point of view. Since I've tried to correct him once already, I feel his presence is less condusive to resolution that it is antagonistic in nature.

So how about some background.. my wife does not jog to the store for milk, or pick up the house, or carry around the child on a constant basis. If a special trip to the store is needed - I go. Otherwise we have weekly grocery shopping together. Since I AM appreciative of both what she went through before, during, and after the pregnancy, I happen to perform the necessary housework (admittedly not too much in an apartment).

What is more, my wife doesn't have to change a diaper when I'm home. I help in every feeding - I change him, bring him to the bedroom, burp him between breasts, make his bottle (we suppliment), feed him the bottle, and put him back down. Not once a day, not taking turns - EVERY time. He now sleeps through the night, but there were evenings when I would handle the midnight feeding alone so my wife could get more rest.

When he wakes up late at night, I handle it. Most of the time we bathe him together, but I have done it alone to save time or rest.

I am the first thing my son sees in the morning - he smiles and even tries to laugh (getting there) every time and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

So look... I'm not resentful of what I do, nor do I consider it more than "my share". It is only my job as a Father. And of course you have no reason to believe me, and that will be up to you (and others).

This is however what I do... I love my family and I am trying to do what it takes to keep us whole. So no I don't appreciate it when someone implies I couldn't care less about my wife or my son. Personally I think that is fair.

-C