Since you and your mom already came to an agreement about the things you both needed during the holidays, can you go back to that? She needs you to interact with the family, so is there some activity you feel you could do that wouldn't be too anxiety producing? Could you go to a movie and just make sure that you don't sit next to your dad? (take the aisle and sit next to your mom?). You've told her that you need space, so when you're starting to feel overwhelmed with her attention, can you say to her "Mom, remember that we agreed that I need some space during the holidays? This is one of those times when I need that space."

Also, since you and your T told your mom that you need a schedule, could you come up with a schedule yourself, and present it to your Mom and tell her - this is the schedule I follow at the residential program, and I want to continue following it here? It's your schedule, don't give her the opportunity to create it for you.

As far as taking meds go, could you just tell your mom that you know she doesn't like the effect it has on you, but your doctor has told you to take them and you don't want to go against your doctor's instructions.