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Do you think you have trouble self-soothing? Object constancy can take time to develop. Have you been seeing your T for very long?
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I have been seeing T for over three years, but have zero object constancy and struggle to self soothe, for sure. Working on the self-soothing with my DBT-T, and object constancy? I wish....
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What helped me with this was keeping a picture of T in my nightstand and listening to some of his voice mails I had saved. It doesn't take everything away, but it does help.
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I do have a picture of T on my phone, and can call Ts voicemail to listen to the message whenever I need (which I do quite often these days, and don't leave a message, per an agreement I have with T) Even that doesn't always help when I'm in the place of drowning.
I'm glad to hear I'm not alone in this, but also sorry that so many experience similar situations! I often wonder if nights would be as bad if I had someone to come home to, someone to say goodnight to, and to cuddle in with if needed. I do have a dog, but he isn't the same as having a husband, I suppose....