I'm sorry Trippin. I know it's not much consolation, but you're among friends who understand here. Feel free to vent all you need to if it'll help and we'll stick with you. Just remember, nothing with BPD, or bipolar for that matter, lasts. I know it's hard to remember that when you're in the throes of it all, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there!