Quote:
Originally Posted by Emily6166
There are some issues that may affect my parents, and can negatively affect me in the future. I am jewish. He is not. However, he wants to convert to judiasm to be with me, which is great. My family is well-off and his is working class. I don't know if he can give me the lifestyle that I am accustomed to now. He's extremely brilliant, but he could not afford to attend college, so he does not have a high paying job. The thing is that I am so in love, so I would not mind downsizing to be with him. I think that now though. I don't know how i will feel in the future...
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I think you both need more time personally. These are a couple of red flags that worry me that I think you both need to really work through.
It's great that he wants to convert to Judaism, but if he does it just to be with you, there's a possibility he will develop resentment in the future. It would be preferable that you could both be together without him having to change something that's usually as fundamental as a religious background.
Second, if you want to keep up your lifestyle, then keep it up. Don't expect him to maintain a more expensive lifestyle for you. You're hesitation about how you would feel about that in future is very concerning.
Overall, I would say you two should spend more time together before making any big changes. Make sure you're both on the same page ya know?
Also, the thing about you not being so open about your feelings with your parents isn't as uncommon as you think. I'm not either. I've always been the emotional rock for my family so I'm not good at talking with my parents about how I feel ... because I usually end up having to deal with how it makes them feel and I resolve nothing.
Best thing is to just tell them about him however you are most comfortable. Then if you need to, start working on the feelings side in little doses and let it grow in time.