Hi. I've been attending AA for almost one year. In that time I've not had any alcohol or my main vice weed. I take pills that I'd imagine count as relapses but whatevah.

I'm having a really hard time getting along with members. I basically ignore the steps because when I did my honest and thourough step 5, 6 months ago, I ended up manic and IP. It was awful and I pissed off a few members. So, it was really hard to return.

I pretty much get the feeling that all my peers have moved on to doing the steps ad nauseum. I don't mean to judge - more power to them. I just am no longer a fit anywhere. I get the feeling that I'm judged for venting rather than making amends and newcomers are steered away from my direction. Like I'm not working a good program. The whole thing is making my bipolar and mental state worse. I don't feel like I'm going to relapse, but the stress from being around AA ppl feels like high school all over and I'm ostrecized for not drinking the Kool aid.

Has anyone left AA or felt unwelcome in their group?

Thanks. Tnt

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