Granite - those records do not invalidate your memories. Both can be correct. Also those reports were from adults who only observed from the outside. They did not observe your internal experience or your perception of outside experiences.

Please do not invalidate your emotions by distrusting them so much. Your emotions are pointing a certain direction and they have clues to your healing. Even if some of the absolute 'facts' do not align (how will we ever know for sure?), it still does not diminish your own experience.

You are NOT lying!!!!!

Also, you were not horrid as a child. Show me one child who has not talked to other students out of turn, who has never been inattentive, who's not been rowdy on occasion and I'll show you a child who does not exist.

If those report cards are accurate, they're nothing to be ashamed of. Perfectly normal for a child to be inattentive. Remember - a teacher is always needing to 'corral' the children to make her life easier and those who don't easily 'corral' will always be noticed.

Not a bad thing. They say the geniuses of the world never fit into a mold - they dance to a different tune. It can be a very good thing and does not make a child horrible - not in the slightest.

Please try to be kind to yourself and not worry so much about what is 'true'. YOUR truth is true.

Many hugs.