Hmm. The "victim" mentality, in my opinion, refers to someone who doesn't feel accountable for their life/circumstances, feels there is nothing they can do to make their situation better, and tends to blame outside circumstances or other people entirely for their unhappiness/problems.

I don't think there can be any time length placed on someone as to how long it's ok to cry or complain - that's a very individual thing, and healing is different for everyone.

If my T implied that I had a victim-mentality, I would probably first become defensive, and then try to take an honest look at whether or not there is any truth to it. I would want to prove the T wrong. I might explore what parts of my life I DO have control over and whether or not there are steps I can take to improve things.