I don't think you should pretend you are ok. How are you going to get the help you need if you are not honest about how much you are hurting. And that is what I see in your words--hurt. There is hope, but please open up and ask for help. I had to learn to ask for help, because I came to realize that I did not know how to help myself.
We care. Say what you need to say. Tell your medical people "I want help!"