That is so terrible. It's true about anxiety being stuck in your head, but to say you don't care and are selfish-that borders on abusive. If that is exactly how she put it, it seems like she might have unresolved issues that seep into your therapy. This can make you worse off than having no therapist. I'm not one to say "get a new T", but this sounds unhealthy, and I really do think it's possible you could benefit from finding a new T. Could you stay with her while you search for another?

Just a suggestion - psychoanalytic therapy is very relational, so they can help with attachment issues, and analysts don't criticize or judge, but rather accept and understand. You could google the name of your city and the phrase psychoanalytic organization, and find the institute nearest your city. They would be glad to give you a referral when you call, and feel free to tell them, briefly, your main concerns over the phone if you can.

It might really help to have someone empathetic and understanding to work through your feelings of loss and grief from losing your former T. My new T is really helping with these types of feelings of loss. There are many Ts out there who are competent and helpful, and who plan to stay in the area and not retire (although no one can guarantee that). Hopefully you will be able to trust again when you have someone more appropriate who could help work through these issues with you.