I think I can relate...it's like I have very little sense of self. It's hard to respond to questions when I'm all over the place in my mind and it's all swirling around making no sense. All this background noise is distracting and of course, I'm also trying to balance in how my T will hear my response and how to word it. I shut down. And then sometimes my words come out and it's like they just don't fit quite right. I don't think so, anyways. So it's frustrating. If I was asked a point blank question like what color is the sky, then yeah I would be able to answer that confidently. But ask me is there a time you can remember when you felt this way before? Um.....maybe, but I'm not sure. I don't want to speculate cause its like if I say it, it might not be right or true or something. And how I feel right now will most certainly change later. Plus, I feel a multitude of feelings all at once about the same thing. Contradictory feelings. It's very confusing and almost scary for me.

I dissociate too. I feel ashamed but then also like it's ok because it's self-protective. But mostly shame.