Ah but if you let go into it sometimes it can feel like a warm bathing in exactly what you want and then it doesn't feel as needy. It depends on a lot of factors so there is no guarantee; that is what makes it feel so risky. Plus it is such an intimate and vulnerable place. If there is some safety, just enough to have some trust, then it can be a positive experience. At least in the session and right after. It takes time to build up so that it lasts in between, but to get there you have to take those first steps. It is scary but worth it. I didn't think so before. But now I feel it. I have ended up internalizing the feeling so I can carry it with me. I still have times when I freak out or feel out of control, but my therapist moves with me during those moments and we get through together. Having someone with you as you work through this very primal material is really crucial. I happen to believe that you have to do it in relation to another, not on your own.