Yeah... I keep throwing myself under the bus because I don't want to find myself a total recluse - what on earth would I end up doing once hypomanic! (hahaha.... )

I just get frustrated with myself after I realize that I've basically just rejected myself due to tiny little instances. Like... I will always have solid reasons as to WHY I won't feel like I'm welcome - but to pretty much anyone else, they would be totally unconnected. I just experience a tiny little piece of rejection or change in someone's behaviour and I take it the rest of the way. It's frustrating and I know I'm not the only person who does that... I just don't know anyone who does it too.