1. I'm an Appalachian too.
And now on to business. I can understand how you feel. I have a very active sex drive but I don't like it. My antidepressants nixed it a good bit thankfully. But I know where mine comes from. I was raped, tortured and prostituted for my childhood. It took me a long time to stop hating myself for having urges. I just don't associate sex with positive things. Masturbating sent me into deep depressions. Being with someone just sucks for me. I want to feel beautiful and sexy and everything others get from sex but I don't think I will. It sucks. I'm a very social person but dating at my age is all about sex for the guys I've met. I'm in college too. I've gotten to the point where masturbating doesn't affect me as bad but being with someone is always a bad experience. I've tried to make it about their pleasure since mine can't be taken care of but it just doesn't work very well. You might try finding someone like me who is scarred in that area. Or look into the fact that you might have repressed a memory that is at the root of this. Good luck

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